"You need to listen to your boss!"

"I don’t have a boss; a dog has a boss."

Do you recognize this? For me, it used to be a standard reaction. Perhaps I had difficulty with hierarchy back then. Looking back, I think it had to do with my inner Goddess Artemis. She has the most trouble with hierarchy. In her world of openness, honesty, and transparency, everyone is equal. This blog is therefore mainly about your inner Artemis!

How Your Archetype Relates to Difficulty with Hierarchy

Not every archetype struggles with hierarchy. For example, Athena fully understands the concept and even aspires to be in charge herself. She’s the top executive who aims to climb to the highest position and knows exactly how the hierarchy works. She skillfully navigates the hierarchy. Persephone, on the other hand, the girl within us, naturally assumes a submissive role and actually needs hierarchy to feel comfortable in that position.

Frustrations Over Power Inequality: Does It Help?

What do you think? Take a moment to reflect. Have you ever been frustrated by power inequality? Did it achieve anything?

For me, it resulted in nothing but a huge drain on my energy.

I once worked at an insurance office. I had dropped out of school to earn money when I was 18. Later, a new colleague joined who was 25, and we did the same job. During a conversation, I discovered that his salary was 25% higher than mine. I was furious and discussed it with my manager. He explained that this was because he was older and there was a rule that allowed organizations to pay younger employees less. My Artemis found this ridiculous and decided to go to the director to complain. My manager was not pleased and called me in for a meeting. During that conversation, I immediately resigned. A typical Artemis reaction: acting out of frustration over power inequality without considering the consequences.

Ultimately, I went back to school.

Learning to Navigate Organizational Structure

What I truly needed to learn was how to navigate an organization’s structure. I remember having a run-in with the school principal as well. I don’t recall exactly what I did, but I believe I laughed at him. Thankfully, my school mentor took the time to guide me through the hierarchy, in this case, at school.

Now, back to you. You likely work somewhere, and it should be clear to you what the company’s structure is. You know, those organizational charts.

This is what we call the formal structure, or hierarchy. You always have to deal with this. It’s important to respect this hierarchy; it’s a key rule of the game. But does this mean you always have to exert influence through these formal lines? No, it doesn’t. You can also leverage the informal hierarchy, your own network of influence. This will be covered in another blog.

But whatever happens, even if you have a manager you don’t get along with, don’t bypass them. Unless you decide, like my Artemis, to resign.

Differences in Hierarchy Between Men and Women

There are differences between men and women when it comes to hierarchy. I know, this is stereotyping and may not apply to you. Still, I find it important to mention because it can explain a lot. These differences often start in our youth.

Unless girls spend a lot of time with boys, they learn to play according to the rules of girls. This means playing together without a win/lose element. For example, they play school, where one girl is the teacher first, and then the other girl. They are therefore equal; there is no hierarchical difference. Boys, on the other hand, play by very different rules. They are working to establish a place in the boys' hierarchy, such as winning a fight, bluffing, or being the best at something. The competition element is important. The one who wins the competition rises in the hierarchy and gains respect from others. Girls do not engage in competition to gain respect from other girls. They are more reserved because they fear that winning over another girl might make them less liked. I discuss this phenomenon, which can lead to crab mentality and Queen Bee behavior, in another blog.

Example:

My daughter Samantha participated in a school running race. She was five years old, and we had just moved to New Zealand. She had just made a few new friends who were also participating. She won the race and received a candy bar as a reward. The first thing she did was share the candy bar with the other girls who participated. She immediately eliminated the competition element by sharing the candy. It wasn’t about respect within the hierarchy for her; being liked was more important.

What you see is that boys learn to deal with hierarchy from a young age, while girls are more focused on equality.

The Importance of Strategically Navigating Hierarchy

Do you need to learn to navigate hierarchy strategically as a woman? Well, you don’t have to, according to me. By the way, the word 'must' is something Artemis doesn’t like. But if you want to advance in your career, it’s useful to learn this. You have to deal with a manager who can decide on your promotion, salary increase, and the projects you want to lead. You might also need your manager for a good evaluation or recommendation. So, learn to navigate it. And I have good news: even if you think your manager is insignificant, there is still hope. Use both formal lines, you know, those organizational charts, and informal lines to achieve your goals.

How to Find Your Place Within a Hierarchical Organization

When you work somewhere, you probably know where your position stands within the organizational chart. The formal hierarchy is clear. This is a fixed fact, and you have to deal with it.

But within this formal hierarchy, there is also an informal hierarchy. And sometimes, it is stronger than the formal hierarchy. It’s important to gain insight into this. Once you have a clear picture of this, you’ll have a sense of your network of influence, and then real influencing can begin! How to do that? I’ll write another blog about it.